Twenty and its dreams

In a book I once read, the author wrote: “A person who lives without a dream is no different from someone searching for the way in the dark.” Someone also once said to me: “In this life you must have dreams; no one taxes dreams, so feel free to dream of whatever you want.” It has truly become the motto of my life, and of many other passionate people, I think. And surely every one of us has dreams of our own — some small dreams and some great ones, some aspirations for the near future and some longings that take perseverance to reach.

I am like you: from my earliest years my life has been full of dreams, some of them practical and some of them full of fancy, quite unrealistic. When I was five, I once wished I could fly in the blue sky like the doves. I dreamed of becoming a teacher when I was in primary school, when the gentle, dear image of my teachers sank deep into my mind and took root there. I once wished to become a doctor when I had to watch my father in pain and exhaustion as illness took hold of him — and there were many other longings besides. But sadly, not every dream can become real; there are dreams we can carry out and there are aspirations beyond our ability. Still, whether or not those dreams come true, they remain beautiful things within each of us, and in their place we have new dreams at a new age.

I am a young woman taking her first uncertain steps into her twenties, the age people often say is the most beautiful of a person's life. Twenty still carries a little of the innocent daydreaming left over from girlhood, and a little of the maturity of an age taking its first steps into life. Twenty is a door opening onto a new horizon, with new difficulties and challenges and also wonderful things waiting for me to discover. That is why, at this beautiful age, I also have burning aspirations that I long to carry out. The dream of joining the wide world, of learning new and unfamiliar things in new lands. That is the dream of "STUDYING ABROAD."

Since I was small, I have been more withdrawn and more introverted than others my age. As I grew a little older, I became even more self-conscious about being smaller in build than my friends, and so I curled up even further inside my shell. I always built for myself principles and standards at a safe level and bound myself within them. Then, as I took my first uncertain steps into my twenties, I was overwhelmed, and I met new difficulties and new shocks to my spirit.

I felt as though I had lost my bearings, had no dream, and did not know where to go. At that time I cried and prayed to God every night: “Lord, show me what I must do.”

It seems He heard my plea, and He led me to a career-guidance talk for students given by a young teacher. The teacher spoke about the education systems of developed countries, about scholarships to study abroad, and about the interesting things in those lands. It drew me in strangely; I felt an unusual excitement and curiosity, and from then on the dream of studying abroad took root in my heart.

As the dream of studying abroad burned in me, I also came to know that finding or building a dream and carrying a dream out are two completely different things. Carrying out a dream, whether small or great, takes enormous effort, because the road to a dream is full of difficulties, thorns and challenges. And so not every dream can be carried out; there are people who have had to abandon their beautiful dreams along the road to reaching them. I too saw those difficulties in my dream. Perhaps the first difficulty for me was money: studying abroad takes a great deal, especially in developed countries, and it is far beyond my family's means.

Besides that there were many other worries, because before this I had never dared to think about studying abroad.

I worried and wondered: Would I have enough knowledge and enough skills to live in a completely unfamiliar environment, with the intensity of study and work found in developed countries? Would a girl who lives inwardly and always keeps herself inside a safe shell have enough courage to face new difficulties in a strange land, without her parents' arms around her, without relatives or friends beside her? And many other thoughts besides...

But the twenty-year-old me does not allow herself to run away; instead I choose to face things. I began to think and to find my own way of solving each difficulty, each problem. I began to look up the websites of organisations that award scholarships for students to study abroad and to learn about the scholarship programmes; I looked into the requirements set for winning a scholarship to study abroad and tried to meet them. I also looked up more information as well as the distinctive cultures of those countries, so as to understand them and to prepare what I would need. I read more books, studied foreign languages and worked on the soft skills I would need. And I have not stopped changing myself, breaking the shell I built around myself all this time, by taking part in more community activities, opening my heart more to people, widening my social relationships. I challenge and test myself by entering competitions… I am striving every day in my studies and in my training, to prepare a solid foundation for myself and to step firmly, one step at a time, toward my dream.

On the road to my dream, through my own efforts I have also received results I deserve. A small joy at a high mark or good academic results, memorable experiences from competitions or from taking part in group activities, or simply the warmth I feel at a word of encouragement from those I love.

But in the course of carrying out my dream I have not always received good fortune and happiness. “Because life is not made of joy alone”, there have been times when I felt tired and disheartened, times when I felt powerless before difficulties, and times when I wanted to give up. In those hard moments I always turn to God and talk with Him; I ask Him to walk with me so that I can overcome those difficulties and challenges, and to give me more strength. Throughout my journey, I share with Him my joys and my happiness, and I ask for His help when I meet hardship.

I see clearly His footprints walking with me along the whole road. And so I do not fall, I do not give up, and my worry grows less. I always believe and place my trust in God; beside Him my heart feels light and strangely warm. “Lord, walk with me.”

Each of us has our own dreams, and all of those dreams are beautiful. I too am drawing closer to my dream day by day. Although the road to each person's dream is entirely different, and along that journey we will meet no small share of hardship, I hope we will be strong and get through it without giving up; let us give our all in facing every difficulty. Smile brightly, take a deep breath, and say: "Life! Don't test me, because I will win against your challenges." Dream, and carry your dream out with courage, because after the rain the sky will be bright again, and this life still has many beautiful things waiting for you.

Matta Trần Thị Quỳnh Trang Parish: An Nhiên – Văn Hạnh Deanery Field: Banking Academy of Finance